“Lessons from a 30 year old” is the title of this post. Yes, that’s right. As of today, I’m 30 years old. Or let’s be a cheese ball and just call it what it truly is: 30 years young (cuz we all know that I’m a big kid.)
Lesson #1: Don’t throw tantrums.
If you know me personally, or have been keeping up with me on here, you’re likely aware that this has NOT been the best year for me. Nothing ages a person like the death of a parent. By “aged,” I don’t mean just the physical and mental stress of enduring a significant loss. I’m also referring to the sudden loss of interest in throwing tantrums about things in life that just aren’t fair.
After a big loss, you have to deal with the aftermath, which can sometimes take months to reveal itself. Once it finally does, the rubble falls at a dizzying speed. You question your sanity. You question the sanity of others. Some people perplex you, while others disappoint you. And, sometimes, you yourself disappoint you, especially when you try to fight what’s not fair in the situation. The biggest “not fair” (my dad not being here) can’t be changed. Kicking and screaming won’t change that… or anything else. By the time you realize this, you’re too exhausted to try to fight anything else outside your control.
Lesson #2: Shine your light on others.
Every person has a unique energy that has the potential to be so powerful, it can change lives. It can change lives for the better. And, it can change lives for the worst. Understanding the power your attitude and actions have on others is paramount to leaving the world a better place. If you’re constantly comparing yourself to others, competing with others, trying to one-up people, or sound smarter and better, then you are not activating and beaming the positivity within you. Instead, you’re leaving a trail of shit brown that destroys. You are operating from your ego, instead of your higher self.
Don’t be scared to be a nice person. Don’t be ignorant to the awesomeness in others. Don’t be intimidated by it, either. Remember that you, too, are special. You have gifts to share. And, there are plenty of rewards to go around.
Lesson #3: Accept help when you need it.
There are times when you need help. Examples include the first couple of weeks of mourning the death of a loved one, when sick in bed with the flu, when struggling to understand a new concept, when moving, when having a “no good, very bad day,” and the list goes on.
When help is offered by a friend or family member (whether that be in the form of a warm meal, hug, advice or otherwise), don’t say “No.” Accept it. Someone is offering you something out of the goodness of their heart. You owe it to them (and yourself) to accept. And, guess what? The simple act of admitting that you’re weak and vulnerable is one that requires you to overcome the ego. And, that’s a very good thing.
Lesson #4: Be your biggest publicist.
If you have any sort of ambitions in life (and I know most of you do), you must drop the hipster aloofness when it comes to who you are, and what you have to offer the world. Your potential clients, bosses, Facebook “likes,” Twitter followers, etc. aren’t going to fall onto your lap. You have to go out and get them. And, to do that, you have to ask for it.
That’s right, honey. You have to ASK for it. Is your face turning red? I know. It can be a little intimidating. Does the mere thought of this bring a vision of people laughing at you, and shouting that you’re a phony? A fake? Not good enough? Oh, I feel you. Man, do I ever feel you!
Promoting yourself is scary. Telling the world that you are taking yourself and your gifts seriously can be temporarily paralyzing. Notice I said “temporarily”? Well, that’s exactly what it is – temporary. You’ll push through it. And, you’ll get used to going out to get it, instead of waiting for it to magically come to you. That’s how a business or career is made… or so I’ve been told.
Lesson #5: Be (mostly) selfish with your free time.
The year (around 2008ish) I started saying no to shindigs and invites I had no interest in, my social circle shrunk to a breathable size. Relationships that no longer served me withered away. In their place grew a few new connections, which were much deeper and more aligned with my true self. By saying no to the things and energies that no longer served me, I attracted the things and energies that do.
Think about it – you only have so few hours in a day, so few days in a week, so few weeks in a month, so few months in a year, and so few years in a life. Therefore, spend it doing the things you love. Yes, it’s selfish and rightfully so! It’s YOUR life. YOUR life. There is no going back. Fill your life with all of the things and people that you love, while finding some slices of time to give back to others. There’s a plethora of volunteer opportunities out there, as well as simple opportunities to help others in your ordinary day. Make your life count!
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Gina Mizzoni (of Gina Mizzoni Photography) is a custom Las Vegas lifestyle photographer (and storyteller) specializing in a variety of custom services including maternity, engagement, portraits, boudoir and family (human and fur-baby) portraits. Gina is also a landscape photographer and documentarian with a true passion for the great outdoors and the state of Nevada. Her medium consists of two: pictures AND words.
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